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Tag: You're kidding me! (21-30 of 69)

Ke$ha to publish illustrated memoir -- We want ghost sex!

Ke$ha has apparently taken the words of her latest hit “Die Young” to heart and decided to make the most of her life while she can — she’s announced plans to publish a memoir at the tender age of 25.

The illustrated memoir will feature the singer’s “thoughts and reflections” as well as a series of pictures ranging from her early years to her most recent tour. (Dang! I had hoped “illustrated” meant literally hand-drawn by Ke$ha.) READ FULL STORY

One Direction fanfiction story to become book


Just call it 50 Shades of Beautiful.

16-year-old U.K. teen Emily Baker is the envy of not only One Direction fans, but wannabe authors everywhere. She has just inked a deal with Penguin to publish her fanfiction story about a teen who is in an intense romantic love triangle with two of the boys from One Direction.

Much like how 50 Shades of Grey was originally a Twilight fanfiction story called “Master of the Universe,” Baker’s original story (which, since this announcement, has been scrubbed from the Internet) will have the names changed so there isn’t copyright infringement, and has been worked into a more general story about an everyday teenage girl that gets involved with members of a popular boy band.

In a press release, Penguin said they had been looking to commission a writer to pen a romantic YA novel that “tapped into the current obsession with boy bands.” At the same time, senior fiction editor Lindsey Heaven said she was browsing online youth writing community when her attention was drawn to Baker’s story. “We at Penguin Children’s are delighted to be publishing Loving the Band. Emily’s novel is fresh, romantic, current and completely taps into today’s pop culture. Her love of a certain boy band is heartfelt and her passion feeds into every bit of her writing.”

'Tiny Food Party!': Tiny tacos, chicken 'n' waffles, Pop Tarts, and more -- SEE PHOTOS


What is it that makes tiny food so appealing? Is it because it makes you feel like a giant-sized person eating normal-sized food?

Whatever the reason, Tiny Food Party! (Oct. 9) by Teri Lyn Fisher and Jenny Park serves up a visual feast of bite-size recipes for miniature meals that stray a bit from run-of-the-mill hors d’oeuvres: the book includes instructions on how to make micro-shepherd’s pies, Vietnamese sandwiches, and something too wonderful to be real called Itty-Bitty Candied Bacon Churros. Click through to ogle some of the coolest creations — even though it’s not quite as fun as eating them.

FIRST UP: Snack-Size Seafood Cocktail Cups

'Fifty Shades of Grey' inspires dirty chicken cookbook: 'I've been practicing BDSM for years -- but with poultry'


The Fifty Shades of Grey phenomenon has inspired a number of copycats and spoofs, but it will attain a whole new level on Nov. 13 when the first Fifty Shades cookbook hits the market. (Just in time for Thanksgiving!)

Fifty Shades of Chicken — a title that sounds absolutely revolting when you think too hard about it — chronicles the relationship between a chef and his chicken. Because that sounds so impossibly ridiculous, I’ll just let the author tell you about it herself.

“The recipe and headnotes follow a chef and his chicken on an emotional journey very much like the original trilogy,” FL Fowler — a nom de plume — said in an email to People. “You start with an overbearing cook and a pigheaded chicken but by the end they’re spanking and tying each other up like soul mates. There’s a bit of Christian and Anastasia Steele in every dish.”

Yes, that is in fact a real quote. Here’s another, if you think you can handle it: “Like so many others, Fifty Shades of Grey resonated for me,” Fowler continued. “It evoked something I’d never been able to express. Then one day as I was tying up the ankles of a chicken for roasting, I realized why some of the scenes in the book were so strikingly familiar. It turns out I’ve been practicing BDSM for years — but with poultry.” Sample recipes include “Mustard Spanked Chicken” and “Dripping Thighs.”

While I realize that this is a parody — as it boldly declares on the cover of the book — there are some things that are sacred. And not having an image of my chicken spanking me is one of those things. What’s worse is the author chose my real last name as his/her (let’s be honest, probably her) fake one. I already have to deny accusations of being married to Montel Williams. I don’t want to have to start defending myself against allegations of cavorting with naughty chickens.

What do think readers? Will you purchase this cookbook? Will you serve “Dripping Thighs” to your family this holiday season? Will you ever be able to eat chicken again?

Read more:
Ten ways to tell you’re enjoying an evening with ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ author E L James
On the scene: E L James talks ‘Fifty Shades’ with Katie Couric
‘No Easy Day’ dislodges ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ from bestseller list

See the irreverent trailer for Jenny McCarthy's memoir 'Bad Habits' -- EXCLUSIVE VIDEO


The road from God-fearing Catholic schoolgirl to Playmate of the Year is always a complicated one, but it can also be quite funny. Jenny McCarthy has already written six best-selling books, but she’s never delved so deeply into her ultra-religious upbringing as she does in Bad Habits: Confessions of a Recovering Catholic (Oct. 2). Growing up, the former Playboy mainstay dreamed of becoming a nun rather than an actress/model, and the book chronicles the many twists along the way that took her life in a very different direction.

Check out the irreverent trailer for Bad Habits, which follows McCarthy as she attends a reading group for nuns. It looks to me like a preview for an actual reality show on Lifetime. READ FULL STORY

This exists: 'Fifty Shades of Grey' the Magazine

There are sex workshops. There is lingerie. There are even baby clothes and beer cozies. But just when you thought the Fifty Shades of Grey craze couldn’t go any further, it did.

There is now an entire magazine dedicated to E L James’ erotic novel. Yes, you read that right. An entire magazine (whose cover looks suspiciously familiar).

Fifty Shades Of American Women Who Love The Book And Live The Life, which was published on Tuesday, boldly proclaims that it features 80 pages of sex secrets. (Apparently, it’s Cosmo on steroids.) It also offers Fifty Shades-based scavenger hunts, Christian Grey-inspired cocktails and even a story about a sex whisperer who says she uses “her body to fix broken men like Christian Grey.”

What looks most interesting to me, however, is the Fifty Shades of Grey quiz that determines exactly which shade of grey you are. I am curious to see if they can actually name fifty shades of grey.

But what I think is perhaps most relevant to us all is the announcement that James is working on a fourth Fifty Shades book. Last I heard, there were no plans to expand the series beyond a trilogy, so this is certainly a turn of events.

So readers, are you planning to purchase Fifty Shades Of American Women Who Love The Book And Live The Life? And, should the news about the fourth book be true, what would you like to see in it? Personally, I’d like it to focus on Christian and Ana’s two children. I’m thinking… Fifty Shades Again? The Fifty Shades LegacyFifty Shades: 2 Fast 2 Furious?

Read more:
‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ heats up: Charity orders public burning of the erotic novel
Style & Design: Alexander Skarsgard’s GIFs, 50 years of Bond Girls and more
Barnes & Noble finds its inner goddess with ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’

Top 10 'True Blood'-iest recipes in the 'True Blood' cookbook

True Blood may have wrapped its fifth season this past weekend, but that doesn’t mean you’ll have to be True Blood-less for long. As we previously reported, the show is releasing a cookbook inspired by the series.

True Blood: Eats, Drinks, and Bites from Bon Temps won’t be out until after Labor Day weekend, so unfortunately you’ve have to make do without Sookie Stackhouse’s What a Fried Chicken at your barbecues. But we thought we’d give you a little taste of what to expect in advance of the cookbook’s Sept. 5 release, so we’ve put together a list of the top 10 True Blood-iest recipes in the True Blood cookbook. READ FULL STORY

'Fifty Shades of Grey' heats up: Charity orders public burning of the erotic novel


Fifty Shades of Grey just got a whole lot hotter. (Couldn’t resist the pun.)

A British charity for domestic abuse has announced plans to hold a mass burning of E L James’ erotic novel. Clare Phillipson, director of Wearside Women In Need, described the book as “dangerous” and insisted that it could potentially encourage domestic abuse.

“I do not think I can put into words how vile I think this book is and how dangerous I think the idea is that you get a sophisticated but naive young woman and a much richer, abusive older man who beats her up and does some dreadful things to her sexually,” Phillipson said. READ FULL STORY

Barnes & Noble finds its inner goddess with 'Fifty Shades of Grey'

Haters, say what you will about Fifty Shades of Grey, but it just may be responsible for saving one of the largest bookstore chains out there.

Barnes & Noble Inc. reported a smaller than anticipated loss for its fiscal first quarter, and it seems that may be due at least in part to the phenomenal sales of E L James’s erotic series.

Barnes & Noble’s net loss numbered $41 million last quarter. This may sound bad, but if we compare it to the same quarter in 2011 (when the company reported a loss of 56.6 million) it’s actually an improvement. Furthermore, Barnes & Noble saw its total revenue rise 2.5% to $1.5 billion. READ FULL STORY

Caroline Manzo of 'The Real Housewives of New Jersey' has a book deal

Books tend to be a huge source of drama on The Real Housewives of New Jersey. In the first season, a dinner party devolved into a shrieking, plate-shattering mess when Danielle Staub slid a copy of Cop without a Badge across the table. When Teresa Giudice made a few passive-aggressive jabs at some of her costars in her cookbook, friend turned against friend and sister turned against sister. Now tough-talking matriarch Caroline Manzo is getting in on the publishing game with Let Me Tell You Something, which will be released by HarperCollins Mar. 26, 2013 — and who knows whether it’ll stir up more drama if the ladies come back for future seasons. The title references Manzo’s most recognizable quote, uttered at the aforementioned table-flipping season one dinner party: “Let me tell you something about my family, we are as thick as thieves and we will protect each other until the end.” In the book, Manzo will impart advice on family, friendship, and happiness.

Will you let Caroline Manzo tell you something come Mar. 26?

Read more:
Andy Cohen: “I Wanted to Tell a Dream-Come-True Story”
‘Real Housewife’ Taylor Armstrong to write memoir about abuse
A book commits suicide every time you watch ‘Jersey Shore': Do you read high-brow, watch low?
Real Housewife Kelly Bensimon wants to make you ‘Hot’

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