Hell hath no fury like a political wife scorned.
It was true with Elizabeth Edwards, who took her husband John to task in her most recent book, Resilience, and it’s certainly true with Jenny Sanford. You remember Sanford – she’s the wife of South Carolina governor Mark Sanford. (You know, the one who told his staff and his family that he was going to go hike on the Appalachian Trail and instead flew to South America to see his girlfriend.) Jenny Sanford remained quiet during the ensuing media hullabaloo, letting the press skewer her husband while she retreated to the family’s beach house with their four boys.
Now it’s her turn to do the skewering, and boy, does she let him have it. In her by turns funny, thoughtful, and introspective memoir, Staying True (which goes on sale today), Sanford looks back at her marriage and her husband, giving, to her credit, what seems to be a well-rounded portrait of him. Here we have not just a philanderer but a go-getter, a restless man with a zest for life. An incredible cheapskate. A loving son and brother. A tireless campaigner. A strict, if largely absent, father. Here are some of the highlights (or, rather, the lowlights):
How he was a jerk early on: The first Thanksgiving they were married, they joined Mark’s family at the Sanford farm — where Mark informed her he’d be bunking with his brothers, not with her. “I’ve always slept with my brothers and I don’t see why that has to change now that we’re married,” he told her.
How he pinched pennies: One year, for her birthday, he gave her a drawing of half a bike; for Christmas, he drew the other half. A few months later he handed her a $25 used bike. Then there was the time he had a staffer pick out a necklace for her—but when he saw her wearing it, he said, “That is what I spent all that money on? I hope you kept the box!” He returned the jewelry the next day. And he was once too cheap to hire an exterminator when their Charleston house was infested with bats.
How his disregard for her turned callous: When Sanford needed a tubal ligation (she had been through four difficult pregnancies and could not risk another), she went to the hospital alone. “As I was wheeled in for surgery, the nurse asked me why I didn’t have anyone with me for support.” And shortly after she discovered his long-running affair, he began “pestering me for permission to see his lover…so he could find the ‘key to his heart.’” When she demurred — she knew she could forgive him for what had happened, but condoning continued adultery was another matter — he asked her, “Do you want to wake up when you are eighty and know you never had a heart connection?”
People will no doubt criticize Jenny Sanford for writing this book and airing so much dirty laundry about her husband, a man once buzzed about as a presidential contender. But I think he had it coming (in fact, I think the very idea of using a book as revenge is pretty delicious.) He publicly humiliated her, not once but time and time again over the last year. She has every right to humiliate him. That’s how I see it, anyway. You?
Wow, this book seems like it’s very telling. I guess it is revenge-no better way of setting the past free by telling it to a huge audience. May just pick it up.
Just finished her book. It is a must read. I really respect this lady for the way she has handled this matter. She is a great role model. I wish the best for her.
“he was once to cheap to hire an exterminator”
Can someone change this typo?
THIS!
Reese, get some reading glasses.
The typo was fixed.
Why did she stay with this idiot? That first Thanksgiving should have been the last. Talk about letting her know exactly where she stood in his life!
So the dude is no longer gov? I guess I missed the news and circumstances of his departure. He’s probably playing golf with John Edwards.
He’s STILL gov! A funny thing – when he ran for gov the first time, my co-worker said there is something about that man I don’t like. She said he looked like ‘slime.’ Boy, was she ever right! By the way, we r in SC. We have a few idiot politicians – like the infamous Joe Wilson! LOL
If he was that much of a scumbag, I say let everybody know about it!
She is a strong and well educated woman and will be fine. What about the women who go after these married politicans and sports stars?
This wasn’t a review. It was a rather nice read but not a review.
Does anyone else but me think this guy, like most rich, white ,politicians, is just absolutley nuts??? People like this are not born with any common sense and they’re losing ground the older they get. Is she sure she didn’t marry FRED Sanford? Another idiot bites the dust. Moron.
Jenny Sanford is a very beautiful and intelligent women. He sounds very very lost… good luck to her and her boys!!! They will be stronger for the bumpy journey they have been on…
My big problem with this is the statement that they needed an exterminator because the house was infested with bats.Bats are good guys, they’re protected, and it’s illegal to exterminate them. You’d think a political figure would at least take the trouble to learn that.
Even if bats aren’t legal to exterminate, it is perfectly legal to have them trapped and removed from a house (which an exterminator can do as well).
I read another review of this book that quoted Jenny Sanford as saying that her husband refused to promise to be faithful to her while performing their wedding vows. He actually had the priest skip that part! If that wasn’t an indication of things to come, I don’t know what is…
Jenny Sanford MADE her husband’s political career. It was because of HER that he had any standing at all to even dream about things like presidential candidacies or promoting himself as a high ranking politician to his hussy in whatever country far off country it was that he slithered off to, and pulled down his pants for – time and time again.
She is the real deal. A intelligent, capable and strong woman who should run for president herself.
She does not need anyone. Unlike her weak kneed, cowardly, low bellied lying and cheating husband.
Go Jenny, Go!
It was my understanding that Jenny Sanford brought a HUGE amount of money into this marriage. And that money gave them the lifestyle the family enjoyed, not to mention loot for the political coffers. His very cavalier attitude shows a true sociopathic narcissist in his very worst light. A pox on him.
Another good reason to follow the advice in Fein and Schneider’s 1995 book, The Rules. She would never have gone out with him twice if she’d read that book. Nice that women are advised to make men work hard if they want to get a date and/or keep her.
So why did she marry the jerk? She knew some of this before the wedding reception. Sorry, I just think if you marry a scumbag when you know he’s a scumbag, you’re the dummy. Look at Tiger, you know that girl knew he was a playboy. I’m sick of women playing the victim when they married for fame and money.